The Ballad of Conrad and Ariel

By Conrad Karsten, with just a few suggestions by Ariel Miller

Conrad and Ariel met in college, and after several near misses began a turbulent courtship full of whimsy and angst. Like many doomed undergraduate dalliances, their love burned brief but bright. They split up after graduation - not a mutual decision, but nonetheless wise - and yet they remained in each other’s lives, unable to fully let go.

Over the years they built a friendship anchored by candor and mirth. They would take long walks in Capitol Hill with Irish coffee and argue good naturedly about nonsense. Conrad would call Ariel during long drives and tell stupid jokes, and Ariel would videochat from Europe to inform Conrad of her latest fancies.

When Ariel went away to Europe in 2020 to pursue a master’s degree, however, something in the winds began to shift. Their transatlantic chats stretched late into the night and topics turned serious and intimate. Conrad began to suspect that some embers still glowed, and Ariel awaited her American homecoming with nervous excitement.

When they reunited on a rainy afternoon in the summer of 2021, all bets were off. The next few months passed in a whirlwind as they stitched their lives together. Conrad wrote Ariel’s name thirty-seven times on the closing paperwork for the Capitol Hill apartment that she bought when she was overseas. Housing secured, Ariel chose instead to spend all her time at Conrad’s basement apartment. The two agreed they needed more space and took over the top floor of a DC row home where they now reside with an endless cavalcade of eclectic friends from Airbnb.

In Summer 2024, after years of debate on the merits of matrimony, Conrad made up his mind. He picked out a delicate wedding band and flew to visit Ariel in Denmark. Once there, they biked together to a beautiful spot on the coast of the North Sea, where Conrad turned to Ariel, got down on one knee, and said, “Baby, let’s quit messing around.” He was very lucky a pair of good samaritans caught the moment on camera.

It was a surprise to everyone but Ariel, of course. Somehow, even though Conrad only told two people, Ariel just knew.